In relationship sometimes your partner will do something you don’t like because no one is perfect. And whether born again holy or not, born in heaven sometimes you both are going to have a misunderstanding.
It is the way you handle disagreement in your relationship that will determine the success of the relationship. Not handling conflict very well might make you want to break a good relationship. Most times there are some things you will not like that your partner do but you can magnify the good and work out your difference.
Today, I will be discussing six helpful hints on avoiding disagreement and how to resolve conflict in your relationship.
AVOID ASSUMPTION: Assumption have been known to kill an otherwise good relationship when you have doubt about your partner’s intentions. Give him or her benefit of the doubt and allow the situation to become clearer. Better still, you care ask him or her in a peaceful, lovely manner. The Bible says in Prob 15:1 A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.
AVOIDING REFERING TO THE PAST: Do not be like the archaeologist that lives by digging up the past. This is certain to trigger conflict. Every human being has an aspect of his or her past that undeterminable, and if your partner has shared his or her with you, this is an act of love and trust for it will not do your relationship any good. You will do well not to revisit such incidents or keep referring to past mistakes let the dead remain dead, always remembering that there has to be a leaving before there can be a cleaving. If you cannot leave the past alone, you may not be able to cleave to your partner successfully.
IDENTIFY THE SOURCE OF THE CONFLICT: Another hint on resolving conflict in a relationship is identifying the real cause of the disagreement. If the cause can be identified and tackled there will be reconciliation.
AIM AT RESOLVING NOT WINNING: You should not see your partner as a separate person. The two of you are supposed to be one. If you understand this, then competitive stance in arguments will be avoided. Have you ever struggle to beat yourself or gush yourself aside? Besides if you win an argument with your partner who will you tell the victory story? You do not deserve a handshake or an award, as you have just shot yourself in the leg. Let your chief aim in any argument with your partner be how to resolve the matter. Avoid concentrating on winning, for this will only create further strife and resentment between you.
MAINTAIN HEALTHY EMOTIONAL ACCOUNTS: When you think about how your partner has invested in the relationship and how he/she is committed in making things work, it will reduce your resentment. Maintaining healthy emotional account is where you have given much into the relationship emotionally. Maintaining healthy emotional accounts helps resolve disagreement.
MAKE TIME TO TALK: Leaving issues unresolved soon leads to a built-up that could be explosive. Make time to talk to your partner communicate. See what has been bugging him or her and nip the matter in the bud.
If you are too busy to spare sometime for quality communication with your partner, you will soon have all the time in the world with nobody to share it with, when he or she gets frustrated with your presence. BE WILLING TO MAKE- UP: Always be willing to make-up, no matter who is at fault or what caused a disagreement. Show this by your attitude towards your partner. Some people, once there is a misunderstanding in the house, go about wearing a long face, thereby putting a brick wall between themselves and their partners. This is wrong. The Bible says in Prob 19:11 The discretion of a man deferreth his anger even in troubled situations, be the peacemaker, still call your partner by his or name and talk to him or her with kind words what you have is a misunderstanding not a war, if you treat it like a war, that is the real conflict, and not the unresolved issue. Continue next week. Cheers!